Here are things you’ll hear a history buff say on a regular basis, that no one else cares about:
“Hang on, I gotta read the plaque in front of this monument.”
“If this is a Renaissance fair, why is everyone dressed for the High Middle Ages?”
“How many questions about life in the 1950’s can I ask your grandma without annoying them?”
“You’re ready to leave?? We’ve only been in this museum for four hours.”
“Excuse me, are ghosts in this haunted castle dressed in historically accurate attire?”
“I wish we were still writing letters instead of texting.”
“No, Benjamin Franklin did not come up with up that 4,000-year-old proverb.”
“Antiques are not ‘junk’. They’re treasures.”
“Too soon, bro” (when someone jokes about the destruction of the Library of Alexandria.)
“Modern self-help books are all wisdom from 2,500 years ago.”
“Why is everyone making fun of the Civil War reenactment? These people are cool.”
“I had to stop metal-detecting in people’s lawns when the police came.”
“Memes are just the latest incarnation of etching jokes into stone tavern walls.”
- Joe
A version of this was originally published on my website, History Hustle.
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